Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Relationships Required

I've been posting a number of fiction and fantasy pieces lately.  I love getting feedback - leave me comments, send me an email, or message me on FetLife.  Whether  you love it or hate it, I want to hear your opinions.  I want to know what works, what turns you on/off, what you especially liked, what you would like to read more of.


But if you think I've written a script I'd like to play out with an anonymous person...full stop.  I am non-monogamous, but intense play requires a relationship and a great deal of trust.  My version of non-monogamy is not random encounters; it is relationship based.  In fact, I've discovered that the best thing about the scene is the relationships that develop.

A relationship does not begin with "I'd like to play out the deepest, most intense scene you've written about on your blog."



  1. Bravo! I've just started reading your blogs.. and love them! You are an articulate writer, and I love reading cohesive blogs .. especially those that resonate with me! (even when they aren't up my alley, they are still worthy reads! Who knows, I might learn something!)

    I have to see if we are friends on fetlife.. so I can keep up with you there! We have quite a few of the same friends I'm sure! :-)


  2. ps.. I totally concur with you on the non-monogamous play... meaning you play with those you've formed relationships with.. due to the trust, respect, and compassion involved. I'm also not into random play on major scene levels, as I'm of the same mindset as you concerning non-monogamous relationships. ~Z

  3. One of the things I enjoy about reading, be it blogs or threads on FetLife, is finding out about new things I might not have thought of before. Of course it's great when something is "right on" with what you like, but it can be fun to learn about other things too.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  4. I've found that perceived reputation can also cut many ways. I'm often asked to play in one way or another based upon my own likes or stories about how I've played with others. The fact is that I'm not always in the right frame of mind to play a certain way and also have to be sure the person I'm playing with is willing or capable of carrying out a scene the way I'd like it to go. This is true of role play. I hate a broken role play scene because it jolts me out of my headspace and out of the character I'm in and can leave me feeling rather foolish for engaging in it in the first place. I tend to avoid scenes that make me walk away feeling foolish.

    I understand what you're saying, though. It's like looking at a person's fetish list on Fetlife and then thinking they are OK with doing all of that on the first meeting. Uh, no.

  5. Hi Rad! Great to see you here!

    Let's not get me started on reputation...I'll save that for the next time I feel rant-y. :) But I totally understand what you're saying!

  6. Thank you!! That's the truth! Confidence is great, but sometimes readers don't realize that being TOO forward makes people uncomfortable and being inappropriate or presumptuous is just plain tacky and rude. :) I only become friends with people who demonstrate respect for my perspectives and my boundaries..what a concept! ;) I'm so glad you posted this! Celine

  7. Hello Celine! Glad you stopped by.

    Very nicely said. Respect is a huge thing for me as well.